Owning What Is Ours To Own

Relationship Triangles

Sitting in a counselor’s office as an early 30-something, I remember the psychologist introducing me to the conflict triangle.  It appeared that I had been part of one since childhood without even understanding how I was participating.  What I discovered was that when the two people in my life were in conflict, I was the emotional support for both […]

Time to Tame the Beast in Your Teen?

Dealing with Emotional Outbursts

Let’s face it, most of us have emotional outbursts from time to time.  Even if not openly for everyone to hear, at least internally where we tell ourselves that the person who has “hurt” us is in the wrong.  Hopefully we don’t go into this mode as often as our teens, but we do have these […]

Can I Love My Kids Too Much?

Several years ago, when I was at my wits end with one of my kids, someone recommended  a book  When I Lay My Isaac Down by Carol Kent.  I’ve often thought about that title and how it applies to our daily lives, especially as we parent. With more than a decade since I read her book, […]

6 Steps to Help Validate Your Kids

The word validation has been cropping up everywhere I turn for the past two weeks.  It’s something that I’ve struggled with for years.  I always thought empathy and validation were essentially the same thing.  I tended to be pretty good on the empathy front so I assumed that my empathy was in fact validating my […]

50 Things I Learned From Raising a Challenging Child

A Tribute to Our Daughter August 8, 1988-May 30, 2017

Emerging into the world our daughter arrived six minutes after I had waddled through the emergency entrance at the hospital doors.  Our family joke was that she was the creator of drama and the day of her birth was the beginning.  She had orderlies, nurses, and doctors frantically hustling for her grand entrance while my husband, Dave, was […]

Does My Teen Really Need Me Anymore?

Several years ago, as a Human Resource Manager for a large engineering firm, one of my jobs was to interview employees who decided to leave the company. At the time, I was pregnant with my first, so I didn’t fully grasp the concept of total commitment to parenting. As this employee told me that she […]