Tag Archive for: finding self

Lost in the Shuffle

I admit it. I’ve let myself get lost in the shuffle. Me…the parent!

Several years ago, God called me to write and walk beside other people who were doing this thing called parenting with tweens, teens, and twenty-somethings. When the timing was right, (i.e. kids were leaving the nest), I knew I’d have more time…finally…to do what God created me to do.

I put together my blog site…and I began writing. Slowly at first, but I started.

“Hey God, I’m doing what you told me to do!”

Excitement and energy welled up within me. I knew where I was heading and had lots of people rallying around me giving me momentum.

Then it happened. Life got in the way…actually, parenting got in the way.

You may be asking the question. “What? Aren’t your kids practically grown? At least they are all legal adults at this point!”

“Yes, but I’ve let their lives get in the way of doing what God has called me to do.

I actually realized today that it has been a year since I last posted. A sigh of sadness overwhelmed me. Yeah, I’ve been doing all the stuff I’m supposed to do…being a parent; but somewhere along the way, I’ve forgotten that God called me to do more than just parent.

When the kids are young, we pour our lives into them and somehow we’re all entwined. As they get older, they’re doing more on their own and for themselves. If we do things right…they grow up and move away.

But what happens when they come back?

I’ll admit, this past year my focus has been on things other than what God has called me to do. Don’t get me wrong…what I’ve been doing is part of my job description…a daughter who has moved back into town, a son who has moved out on his own, an engagement, several funerals, and the biggest time sink…a son who we brought home from college a year ago in massive pain. I’ve spent more time in doctor’s offices than I would even think possible. I’ve driven a son, who was on prescription medication, to and from college classes at the local university. And I’ve spent days in the hospital playing nurse during his spine surgery.

When I look back, I know I’ve done good and honorable things…but, somehow I’ve lost me.

Today a scripture keeps dogging me.

Jeremiah 29:11-13

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.  Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.  You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

I admit this past year I’ve just been doing the next thing. Whatever my family brings my way, I set aside my desires and His calling and do what they need. But I need to remember…part of parenting is letting my kids know that sometimes they need to learn to be self-sufficient. Part of parenting is letting your kids know that you need a life too…outside of theirs.

Today something exciting happened…to me! A rejuvenation of who God created me to be. At first it didn’t seem like that big of a deal, but then I realized it was! I had an opportunity to talk about parenting during the teen and young adult years on www.Today.Com.

And I was rejuvenated! I realized my passion again! And He showed me that I wasn’t doing what He called me to do. I had lost track of that. I need to put God first…not my kids. Yes, I need to create time for them, but as they grow older I need them to learn to not only depend on Him, but also expand their horizons with others who can meet their needs.

So here you have it…my commitment…to start blogging at least every Monday…and then two days a week…and then three. I want to walk beside you through the tough years of parenting.

Bottom line: Don’t forget yourself during the days of parenting. God has plans for your life. Don’t get lost in the shuffle.

Learning to live the life He calls me to lead.

“Let go and let God…”

Debbie